In The Trenches Blog

Picture of Cher T Sparkle Queen

Cher T Sparkle Queen

In The Trenches

“Though we fall a thousand times, we will rise upon phoenix wings. Strong. Victorious. Reborn.”

I thought the hardest thing I would ever have to do in my life was to learn who I am and what truth is after having my entire life pulled out from under me. But it wasn’t. It prepared me for the hardest thing I have ever had to do…support someone else who has had their entire life come crashing down around them. When it was me, I had the power to choose my path. I had the power to do something about my circumstances. I could find those moments of choice in which I could grasp some semblance of control for myself and my life. When it is someone else, I can merely suggest strategies, offer a safe space to be raw, and connect them with further supports. The choice to heal, to recalibrate, to recover is entirely in their hands.

While it is the most challenging undertaking to love and believe in someone through their process, it is also the most rewarding. There are no words to describe the pride I feel when I get to witness the moment when they realize they have gone an entire day without self harming. To be present when they comprehend that they went an entire week without even thinking about self harming or dying by suicide. To watch them understand the trauma they experienced was not healthy because they now know what it is to be treated with kindness and respect. To see them make their own decisions without fear for the first time. To listen to them believe in themselves with passion. These are the moments that make the war for their lives worthwhile.

Through my own experiences, I know the value of someone believing when we can’t. I know the power of having someone be present and hold space for us to do the healing and treatment work that can feel utterly impossible at times. I know the volatility of releasing a lifetime of squashed emotions. I know what it is to experience body, mind, soul integration after years of dissociation. I know how never ending the crisis can feel. I know that safety, rest, logical thinking, and ease of breath can return. I know that emotions are messengers. I know that emotions can become friends.

Without consciously realizing it, I have devoted my entire life to being a Warrior for healing. My own first. Then my family’s. And now, I actively, consciously choose to be that for those who enter my sphere of influence. Because, damn it, You are valuable. You are loved. You are worth the effort it takes to heal and the strength it takes to keep choosing to live. You have a purpose. And I am so frickin’ proud of you for loving yourself enough to give yourself the chance to unbury your sparkle.

Dance. Fight. Care. 
Cher T Sparkle Queen
Sparkle Kingdom Warriors


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